Yeah, I will admit it. I was Freddy.

April Fools; a time where most people probably say "Oh, I am quitting/leaving (INSERT PROJECT HERE)" and that's the end of it. To put it simply, I thought I would take it a step up for this year. Instead of a throwaway joke, I embarked on a chaotic journey of absurdity and downright silliness, one that took the QLMB Discord server by storm.

Oh, quick thing. In case you just couldn't tell, I am not a stuffed frog from Build-a-Bear.

The Birth of Freddy

It all started with "freddythefrog1029," clicking that fat green "Join" button that Discord likes to make bigger and bigger each update. This was a brand-new account with zero history in QLMB at-all and an ambiguous identity that noone knew. I entered the server, playing the role of an enthusiastic newcomer. My opening line (or catchphrase) was innocent enough on the 31st of March. It was inches away from the big day... and so I said.... "hi guys im new here"

I quickly went on my normal main account to welcome myself. In a way, I really was a dual-wielder on the server, holding my dumbass alt account in one hand, and my main account on the other. It was a secret I held away from Matt though, as he innocently described what QLMB was and how everyone just "talks about tv" in it.

Now though, there was this idea and burning feeling that crept up in my head. I thought about what is the most stupidest and most right-field thing I could say to make sure everybody reacted with that sense of "WTF DID HE JUST SAY?"

This was the spark. The bait was about to get in and be set in the water...

I LOVE FOOD NETWORK!

I know. You'll see why this is important in a moment.

From there, I asked about "Mock of the Month," a QLMB feature where the top three TV or radio mock designs from the server get highlighted. I played dumb, pretending not to fully understand it while plotting something far more devious. Then, with the enthusiasm of a misguided artist, I went all in. (Conor, if you're reading this, I’m sorry you had to deal with my alt trying to ask for advice.) Before I unleashed my torment of Photoshop nightmares, I kicked things off with a simple yet hilariously bad piece in MS paint: a screenshot of Papa's Pizzeria I found on Google, stretched out as much as possible to make it super pixelated, overlaid with the Food Network logo. To elevate the chaos, I added a Live, Laugh, Love PNG and an "Eat Well" apple JPEG. The PNG having a fake transparent background, and the apple having a pure green background, making the entire composition even more hilariously awful. Conor replied back saying: "hmmm i'm sorry but this is just bland." Oh, I was heartbroken. My hardest piece of work ever. Tarnished. I played up to it, asking Conor for advice. They suggested GIMP, and I pretended to take that advice on-board and to come back "better", AKA I thought it was time to unleash my horrors. I created a thread in the mock forums, exclaiming my absolute adoration for the Food Network. I know it was obviously a troll move but it is funny.

This was an excersise in deliberate awfulness. Armed with Photoshop, zero restraint, and a mission to make the most bafflingly bad TV mocks possible, I unleashed a torrent of low-quality monstrosities upon the server. The first creation was the branding (i think, it was a random screenshot from google, i dont actually watch Food Network guys) reimagined with the Apple character from the Annoying Orange, surrounded by an apocalyptic collection of PNGs that I could find to make the image even worse then it already was, including Live, Laugh, Love typography and a woman eating pizza. Of course, no Food Network homage would be complete without a logo. So I threw in an abomination of font and color choices so offensively bad that even the most amateur of graphic designers would recoil in horror. Just for good measure!

The worst thing though? I asked if anyone had any tips, and nobody replied to poor ol' Freddy. Dark times.

Alongside this, to get back at the people of QLMB for not helping me on my quest to be the best mock maker ever seen, another masterpiece: A grotesque take on Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives. The twist? Guy Fieri's face was no longer his own as it was transformed into pepperonis on a pizza. A disturbing yet somehow captivating image that me nor anyone can look on from in sheer horror.

I will be honest, it was like I blacked out completely. I cannot believe what I was doing but it was so fun to do. The next logical step? More Food Network meant ruining Cake Boss. Enter Freddy Valastro. (it was really annoying replacing the text by the way but again, this is another pattern that you will recognise as i go down the list of the shit i did) The iconic Buddy Valastro was no more; his face had been crudely replaced by a cut-out image of the Freddy plush. A work of art? Of course. A masterclass in unhinged Photoshop work? Absolutely. By this point though, came the recognition. Matt and Cypher both recognised the ironic-ness of my work and jokingly hailing it as the next best thing, hyping me up. It was fun making stuff just to see more people flip out, and I wished I got to see more reactions of people flipping out. I still do.

For the next acts, I turned my attention to multiple different show posters. Adding Freddy to Rick and Morty, Masterchef, The Three Day Nanny, and way more which I won't go into detail here, but you can see by joining the QLMB discord here. A plenty of haunting visuals wait for you.

The Aftermath: Accidentally Becoming a Martyr

Like mentioned earlier, At first, the response was predictable: confusion, and laughter. But then, something strange happened. Instead of being dismissed as a mere prank, Freddy became… an icon. A legend for the heavily active side of the server. (Matt revealed this to me after I told him about my antics.) It was hard to believe I became a martyr for all things ridiculous and ironic for TV. People started celebrating the absurdity, questioning the love for the Food Network like scripture, and treating Freddy as a sort of chaotic mascot for the server.

I didn't realise my troll side-joke-project became something so out of my own idea of how I expected this would all turn out. My attempt at low-effort trolling had backfired spectacularly. Instead of being forgotten, Freddy became something people genuinely enjoyed. The irony was palpable, because I can now officially say, that I had shitposted myself into relevance.

Yeah, but did you like the Food Network?

In conclusion, If there’s anything to take away from this entire ordeal, it’s that the internet (or specfically, the QLMB Discord) has a way of turning nonsense into legend. What started as a dumb gag spiraled into something far greater, and in the end, Freddy became more than just a frog. He became a symbol of unhinged creativity.

Goodnight Freddy, You were fun while you lasted. This article hereby declares the time and death for Freddy. The 2nd of April. 2025. 4PM.